More Wedding Rings, Fewer Handcuffs

(Bob)  I have always liked being married and have never felt “tied down” or limited by it.  Sure, there were times when I looked at something I might have done if it were not for my commitment to Rita and our family, but it only took a moment to conclude that the benefits of being married to Rita easily outweighed anything I was missing. With Rita’s love and encouragement and occasional well-deserved reminders that my behavior needed to change, I believe that I am a much better person than I could have become had I never married her.  I never liked jokes about shackles or settling down.  I was very offended when I started teaching in a high school with Rita as my department chair and somebody suggested that “Now she will be your boss 24 hours a day.”  Today I have a little vindication, although it doesn’t begin to cover all of the ways that marriage has made my life better.

In an article at, Wyatt Myers reports that :  Being a bachelor isn’t all it’s cracked up to be — especially when it comes to your emotional and physical well-being.  The article7 Ways Marriage Helps Men’s Health cites studies showing a variety of benefits to men of being married – from having more sex to being less likely to die of cancer to behaving better (less likely to engage in criminal activity) to living longer.

Here is a quote to give you the flavor of the article.

Married Men Are More Likely to Survive a Heart Problem

It sounds cliché, but love is good for your heart — and we don’t just mean metaphorically. In a recent study of 225 people who underwent coronary artery bypass grafting for heart problems, happily married men were more than three times as likely to be alive 15 years after the surgery than their unwed counterparts. Even not-so-happily married men fared better than bachelors: Among the former, the survival rate was 60 percent, compared with 36 percent among the latter.

One reason for this may be that husbands are likely to seek treatment faster than their single friends, possibly thanks to their wives’ reminders or advice. According to a recent Canadian study of 4,500 heart attack patients, 75 percent of married men reported to the hospital within six hours of experiencing symptoms, compared with about 68 percent of men who were single, 69 percent of men who were divorced, and 71 percent of men who were widowed. (The same benefit was not seen in women.)

Read the whole article here.  We hope you enjoy it.

(Rita)  Like Bob I never thought that life would be better without him in it.  Everything I have become and all that we have is a result of our years of marriage together.  I liked this article because it strengthens my hope that we will have many more years together.  Maybe as the month of February draws to a close and the fact that we have one more day this year we could all celebrate our marriages and shout to the world of the values of being married.  Enjoy this day and every year that you are together.

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Bob & Rita’s book:  Forever and a Day:  An Invitation to Create a Marriage that Lasts a Lifetime, is available on  Also available for Kindle and Nook.  Check out our Marriage Enrichment Programs at

Retirement can be a time of stress for marriages.  Has your parish or group considered an enrichment program for seniors?  Check out our program:  Aging Joyfully Together.


About Rita & Bob Boeke

Rita Boeke has experience teaching scripture and with her husband Bob has experience in enriching marriages through workshops and retreats. They post a weekly blog at and co-authored Forever and a Day: An Invitation to Create a Marriage that Lasts a Lifetime.
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